3 Mantras That Should Drive You To Approach That Girl-Next-Door

Having approach issues about stepping to that girl-next-door?

Well- here are 4 ways to mentally psyche yourself up to the task at hand.

Before I begin, I just want to point out that during my earlier years of pickup, I had to psyche myself up to approach any woman, just as the case with most of us at the pre-intermediary stage of the game.

My little mantras were as followed:

• “She could get married tomorrow”

• “She could move tomorrow”

• “I may never see her again for some reason”

• “I may die tomorrow in some freak accident”

As hypothetically driven as you may be inclined to believe that these mantras are, they are pretty much practical and rooted in reality on an everyday basis.

The girl whom you’ve been eyeing may very well have been in the process of moving.

Her boyfriend could randomly propose marriage to her tomorrow as means of salvaging a damaged relationship.

For crying out loud; there’s a real chance of getting struck by a bus on your way to work tomorrow.

There’s no incentive to keep putting it off unless you’re being strategic by building attraction bit by bit over time.

However, if your dereliction to approaching the girl stems from approach anxiety, then you ought to get moving at once!

Once you put things into such a perspective where a sense of urgency is born, finally approaching that girl-next-door would become less scary.

Moreover, this should become your frame regardless of the situation, and regardless of whether this girl literally lives next door and she’s someone whom you see regularly, or someone on whom before you’d never laid eyes.

Music also carries that state-building power which helps to propel you into action.

We all have our favorite songs, or at least know of some songs which gets us pumped and hyped and ready to take on whatever and whomever!

As a newbie in pickup, soaking up game on the MPUA forum, we were taught and advised to listen to state-pumping music before hitting in field, as means of boosting our state, energy and vibe.

Along with that, we were also encouraged by the advanced guys to get in front of a mirror and recite some mantras before doing day game (approaching up women on the streets).

Saying all that to say, these little drills and exercises go a long way in getting you psyched up for the task of approaching women.

Quite frankly, at a mastery level which I have since attained, I no longer have to psyche myself up to approach any chick.

No longer is there a need to give myself an internal pep talk about the importance of going now before my chance slips away.

However, if I were you, and struggling with approach-anxiety issues when it comes to approaching the OYD (Object of Your Desire), I would motivate myself into action by being mindful of the following realities:

• “She could get married tomorrow”

• “She could move tomorrow”

• “I may never see her again for some reason”

• “I may die tomorrow in some freak accident”

“7 Ways To Become Social With Women” [Free E-Book Reposted]

Hey guys, I’m quite impressed at how motivated you are to meet women.

Over the weeks, I’d gotten a few e-mails from pertaining to my 2nd. free-book, “7 Ways To Become Social [With Women]”, which I’d published some time ago.

What actually happened as to why you might not have been able to locate it on the site [plus some dead links are to blame] is because of an inadvertent blunder I’d made while shuffling around some stuff on the site and tweaking things here and there.

Until I get it rectified where I can place the book back into the sidebar, you can download it directly from the temporary link below.


Click to access 7-ways-to-become-social-with-women.pdf

I See Shyness As The Main Thing That Keeps Guys From Getting Laid

Shyness is a social conditioning and probably the reason you aren’t getting laid!

I have a male coworker who possesses the following attributes:

• About 21 years old

• 6’3 in height

• Slim built

• Very good looking

• Has super swagger in mannerism

…Yet he doesn’t get laid…testament of his v-card which he still holds.

This dude has zero reason whatsoever why he shouldn’t be slaying lots of pussy!

He’s society’s ideal of male beauty: tall, dark, young and handsome…very inviting smile and welcoming personality.

The fact that he falls into the nice-guy bracket is another story for another time as to why he doesn’t get laid.

Ok, so after closely examining his dilemma from our many discussions on the subject of women and hooking up, it became readily apparent that the primary reason for this guy not getting laid, is his shyness…nice-guy vibe aside.

The thing that always puzzles me about shy guys is their apparent detachment from the reality of why they suck with women and dating.

They never seem to realize that their most OBVIOUS sticking-point is SHYNESS!

With this being the case, no matter how many techniques and tweaks a guy like myself can provide them [Outer Game]; the techniques still won’t profit them if they’re unable to break out of that shell of shyness.

In my entire years of teaching pickup, I’ve yet to meet a shy guy who realized and admitted that his pitfall with women was his shyness.

I get the impression that most men (the shy types especially), are expecting women to approach them to break the ice.

How do I know that this is the prevailing impression of shy guys?

My coworker in question constantly laments about women not being social and appearing stuck-up.

He arrived at that conclusion [women are stuck-up] because girls aren’t approaching him in spite of his good looks.

Though I never personally give him tips on how to go about meeting women. But even in his presence, I’m constantly approaching and chatting up strangers while we’re out on lunch and tea breaks.

Thus, this guy has more than enough evidence as to why he sucks [shyness] and what he needs to do to get positive results [approach].

Have No Shame In Your Game That You’re Hitting On Women [the article]

Social anxiety is a bitch!

Probably the main thing that keeps guys from coming out of their protective shell, is the fear of social pressure: “others will see and hear me chatting up women”.

Fear of being seen and heard by others in eye and ear-shot, is what deters most men from opening their mouths in the first place while in public settings.

Being naturally introverted to a fault, I used to suffer terribly from this shit also!

When I first got into Pickup, this was arguably 1 of my biggest hurdles and sticking-points which stymied my progress tremendously.

When I seen a girl whom I was attracted to and wanted to meet, fuck and possibly date, I would talk myself out of it- not because I didn’t have the perfect opener for the situation- but that I was ultra-fucking preoccupied with what people would think of me chatting up women.

With the advent of the “10 hours walking NYC” video, the fact that in America today, as I’d written about earlier in the year, there will come a time when men will be shamed and ostracized for looking at women, let alone to chat them up on the streets.

Not only will we men risk their social status of being labeled pervy and sleazy, but a (sexual) harassment charge will be possible…merely for checking out a girl’s package.

This further heightens the hysteria and drive men deeper into their shells as the risk of chatting up women will have been too risky to attempt.

Therefore, just another reason why men are afraid to be heard and seen hitting on chicks.

Personally, I don’t mine the social stigma of being called a perverted sleaze-ball.

I own it because I’m a real fucking man with giant balls of ‘IDGAF’.

However, most men aren’t quite ready to risk their prestige (which they don’t have nevertheless) without concrete evidence as to why they should chat up strangers.

As for now that chatting up women is still lawful, there’s no excuse to not do so.

The reality about others hearing or seeing you game women, is that no one really gives a fuck.

My “5-Minute Kiss” Rule + A Bit On Fear

Seducing women is a very dynamic art and you’re constantly learning new things about yourself and women, that you’re always subjected to change and novel insights and approaches over time.

Shit- I actually thought pickup and learning about women had a timeline or end point…and by now- I should’ve been retired.

What I come to realize is that there’s never a finish line in this Game.

You’ll either constantly grow and change. Or stagnate, pull out and back-slide into blissful ignorance.

Ok, so 1 such “change” and addition to my pick-up repertoire, has been the “5 Minute Kiss” rule.

“What is that”?

“Is it kissing a girl nonstop for 5 minutes…like some sorta challenge”!?

No, no, no.

My “5 minute kiss rule” is a rule which I try my darndest best to adhere to.

If a girl is willing to subject herself to 5 or more minutes of my shit via conversation, then I take that as a green light for me to try to kiss her.

That’s the rule!

There is no magic sign I look for which tells me that I should try to kiss a girl.

If we’re talking for 5 minutes, I take that as the only sign I need to try to kiss her or make out with her.

I’ve actually been running this sorta vicious game for about 9 months now with random girls I meet and chat up on the streets and even in supermarkets.

I don’t always get the kiss or makeout.

However, the “attempt” is what counts!

Showing that you have the giant balls to actually take action, will stop women in their tracks literally, figuratively and emotionally!

I’ve never been slapped, kicked or punched for attempting to kiss a random stranger within 5 minutes of our initial conversation.

To be frank, and I eluded to this in the video below, the worst thing that ever happens whenever I make such ballsy moves, is the girl moves away (playfully) or pulls a bob and weave move or try to hit me playfully as a result [this’ called a love tap].

That’s it!

Now, if that’s the only repercussion for trying to kiss a girl (stranger or not), then why the fuck isn’t every guy out there doing this shit!?

Well, the answer to that is pretty simple: most men are pussies…isn’t exactly news flash.

Ok, I also wanna make a quick point about my style, method and approach to meeting women.

I don’t expect that every guy who reads this (or my blog in general), to suddenly hit the streets trying to make out with girls within 5 minutes of chitchat.

This isn’t a realistic expectation of what I expect from my followers!

I’m cognizant of the fact that humans are risk-adverse, don’t like to take chances and are inclined to make more excuses than a kid who got caught with his hands in the cookie-jar.

Frankly, none of what I write, or even the videos I put out, do I ever think that any guy takes it serious but for a good read and a good viewing.

I’m resigned to the reality that fear overpowers rational by far.

For instance, I have a fear/phobia of lizards…tiny fucking lizards.

Though utterly harmless and I can just squish it with my little finger: no one can ever convince me that I should drop my fear of lizards and to simply grab 1 with my bare hands.

Likewise with trying to convince guys that they have nothing to fear with approaching and trying to fuck the shit out of hot women.

The most macho dude on the planet who can take on a gang of guys by himself without an ounce of fear [though the fear is real], let him loose inside of a bar and tell him to go get laid or try to kiss a girl at least, and I guarantee you he cannot even make an attempt to do such a harmless act with a harmless being (i.e. hot girl).

Therefore, no matter how many times I preach, show and prove to you fuckers that women are in fact harmless-lovely creatures- the likelihood is- you’ll never believe it!

Hence, when I say to you that girls won’t get offended at all if you try to kiss them or do/say something forward, your fear mechanism kicks in and you immediately shrug me off with mental-masturbation such as:

“Kenny only approaches easy girls”!

“That would never happen in my country”

“Kenny can say that because he’s been doing this for years”

“Girls in my city won’t stand for that”!

The list of bullshit excuses is endless!

Long story short; I applaud any guy who’s willing to at least get out of their comfort zone and try shit!

I am no different than any other guy who’s reading this post!

In fact, I was probably worse off growing up than anyone else.

I was that fucking kid in middle school who was anti-social, weird, had no friends but the other weird kid, afraid to speak to other boys let alone girls, didn’t participate in any sport because I dreaded the thought of messing up around others.

My parents actually wanted to seek professional help for my chronic anti-social and withdrawal behavior…it was that critical!

Shit man; I was fucked up in my early teenage years!

Look at me now in 2014!

I can’t walk the goddamn streets without trying to get into some chick’s panties!

If I can go from that to this, imagine what you can do as far as women and dating are concerned.

One way in which you can try to get over this paralyzing hump [fear] is to utilize my “5 Minute Kiss” rule.

I reiterate: you do NOT have to get the kiss or makeout. The “attempt” alone will suffice until you do manage to get the kiss periodically.

You’ll lose some and win some.

In spite of my super-advanced level in seducing women and understanding what makes them tick; I still get rejected!!!

Women often push me off whenever I try to cold makeout with them.

I don’t see that as failure at all- neither should you!

I never get butt-hurt when attempting the kiss and the girl moves away playfully or in astonishment.

Therefore, in doing/trying this, expect to get more rejections than kisses.

It isn’t the success of the “kiss” that will determine whether you’re a man or man-child, but the mere attempt.

You want whenever a girl leaves you presence, she’s thinking:

“That guy had balls”!

Rather than:

“That guy was friendly”!

“Friendly”, she will never remember.

“Ballsy”, she will remember for years to come!

Ok, with that, I leave you with 2 videos from earlier in the year where I playfully tried to kiss a young mom [random stranger] as she walked with her kid in hand.

This took place in under 5 minutes as we walked and chatted [once again, abiding by the “5 minute rule”].

Operative word is “PLAYFUL”!

In the 2nd. video, I kissed a random stranger whom I was fucking with inside of a grocery store…within minutes of meeting her.

Once again; “PLAYFULLY”!

In essence, those were 2 examples where the kiss (attempt) was fleeting and I wasn’t able to successfully plant and create a sensual vibe.

My most recently posted video however, I showed you guys how to create a romantic vibe which will enable you to kiss and makeout with a girl in less than 5 minutes of meeting her.

In essence, you’ve seen 2 fleeting kisses done playfully and 1 romantically.

With girls who are moving, the kiss won’t work as flawlessly as you’ve seen.

With a stationary set (as in the 3rd video), successful-kiss attempt increases.

2 Simple Tips For Breaking Out Of Your Shell And Becoming Social

Two great ways to break out of your shell:

1.) Ask someone who doesn’t look certain, if he or she needs some help as in directions.

2.) Say hi to someone whom you’re not on speaking terms with.

Nearly 2 years ago, I had a massive falling-out with a certain girl and we no longer spoke since then.

On my way to work, I would see this girl like once a week and we would pass each other without the slightest acknowledgment.

One day I said to myself, “Why the fuck not!? Why not say something to her and totally throw her off guard”?

The next time that I seen her, I’d broken the 2 years of silence:

Me: “Hi V******”.

She was so startled that she almost dropped her cellphone. 🙂

She reciprocated with a hi and we kept it moving.

Mission successful!

Second example for you guys to break out of the shell is to ask someone if they need help.

While running some errands, I came across an elderly lady who seemed to have been unsure of where she wanted to go but was too flustered to ask for help or directions.

Noticing this, I immediately took the initiative to say:

“Oh you need help with something”?

Old lady: “Oh yes thanks, I was looking for the *********”.

Irony is, she was actually seeking directions to my workplace.

There you have it: nothing fancy, no ulterior motives besides sharpening your social skills which will help you over time on the journey in dating and getting laid.

Plus- you can’t get laid by not being sociable!

Push comes to shove, my most recent video where I’d approached almost 30 random women about their g-string, you can take that approach to push yourself in the right direction…which is to get laid!

A Compliment A Day Keeps Anxiety Away

Whether it be Approach Anxiety or Social Anxiety, both states of mind are crippling and not so easy to keep at bay.

Do I still have bouts of anxiety when it pertains to approaching unfamiliar women?


Anxiety is like a fucking pest which only comes around when you least expect and in situations where you really don’t need it.

I have quite a few ways in which I handle anxiety and I’ve written about them before: No one gives a shit.

A novel approach to keeping approach and social anxiety away is to just give a compliment a day.

Just give a compliment to one girl a day…preferably a complete stranger.

Not only will doing so keep anxiety away but it’ll also keep your social wheels greased and keep you sharp as a social individual.

The reason I recommend “a compliment” opposed to just saying “hi”, is because a compliment raises the bar and stakes while a simple “hi” doesn’t require much psychological effort.

To familiarize yourself with the seduction-community jargon, check out the acronym and term list: PUA acronym and term list.

Never Judge A Book By Its Cover

One of the most commonly used idioms in the English-speaking world:

“Never judge a book by its cover”.

Now, we know what that means and entails in social settings and gatherings: you judge a person wrongly based on the exterior, then come to find out that the individual kicks ass and fits neatly into your social circle.

With stranger approaches though, that is approaching total strangers (women), men tend to get derailed and have second thoughts about approaching women who have cold and icy exteriors (faces to be exact).

A guy would prefer to approach, introduce himself to and chat up a chick who has a cheery smile on her face opposed to one who isn’t smiley and looks rather stern and uninviting.

This is quite customary irrespective of the sex or situation; no one wants to approach someone who looks uninviting, whether this be while grabbing something to eat, asking for directions, etc. we’d elect to approach the perceived easier targets i.e. the warm and cheery folks.

Well I’m here to tell you that you’ve been blunting your own fucking progress in the social department! 😯

You’ve been a discriminatory prick who judges women (the book) by the cover!

You didn’t approach that sexy girl with the stern-facial expression simply because you thought she would come off as an attitudish-little bitch. 😯

Lemme clue you in on something: the girls who appear to be uninviting are almost always the friendliest, most open, genuine and cheery…just as long as you take the initiative and man up to break the ice.

I know this from year’s worth of personal experience in seduction and cold-approach Pickup [that is approaching tons of random strangers on the streets]. So this isn’t just theorizing and bullshit guesstimation based on futile research as such from some social psychologist or someone who doesn’t have real-world experience in the field.

Electing to not approach a girl because she doesn’t look inviting, just might be a missed opportunity on a girl who could’ve been your next girlfriend, wife or something a little less committed: fuck-buddy. 😉 😉

Another thing that you should grasp: women who aren’t inviting and cheery on the outside, have been told this during their entire lives:

“Why don’t you smile”?


“You always look angry”!

“Change your facial expression for once”!

We all have friends who fall into this category. Perhaps you’re one of them (ice-faced). ❓

With this being the case, these girls grow up to be self-conscious in social settings and generally construct a wall of psychological protection for their self-esteem.

Most of them begin to think that they’re fucked-up in some chronic way and no matter what, just cannot attract guys (or people in general) into their sphere.

Therefore when you approach a girl who has a frigid exterior, her socially conditioned impulse is shut down (further) and congruence test the shit out of the guy who’d approached her.

Within a split second after the initial bump in the road, don’t be flabbergasted when the cheerful spirit pops out to greet you.

I see this happen all the time.

She just wants to be certain within the first 2 seconds, that you won’t judge her on the uninviting exterior, then she can let her inner glee come to surface.

This is no different than a chick who shit tests you and is frosty at the onset, then becomes a fuzzy ball of warmth as you decisively pass the shit test.

Never judge a woman from the first impression.

Her first impression is usually to test you, whether it’s a pleasant or rude 1.

Therefore, never alienate, marginalize or pass up on a girl who doesn’t appear as though she’s advertising toothpaste.

These girls (bitchy ones), even though they’re the hottest generally, are almost always passed up on by men while out with the girls mingling and partying.

They may feel socially awkward, left out and alienated, which is your chance to break the ice and get to know (or bang) a cool-ass chick.

This hearkens back to a night of clubbing I had in 2007 where I took home the hottest girl in the venue…well took her to my hotel actually. 😉

Hot girls are usually bitchy on the exterior, so 99.9% of the guys in the club that night, all elected to NOT approach her out of fear of being scolded, shot down, ignored and rejected in front of hundreds of club-goers. So they chose the perceived easier sets of girls to chat up…which usually doesn’t go anywhere. 😦

I on the other hand, being a budding Pick-Up Artist at that time, I was addicted to tackling the perceived-harder girls who seemed more difficult, hence I approached, isolated, finger-banged, seduced and took home this girl whom every other guy was scared shit to approach because they judged the book by its cover and misjudged poorly because this chick turned out to be one of the coolest girls I ever met in my lifetime…so much so that I even remember her name from a One-Night Stand which occurred years ago…she was also the first and only squirter I ever met to date- so that was a plus for the memory bank. 😉 😉

This is another reason why learning Pickup is great; you get the girls that other guys wouldn’t dare approach even with a pistol to their heads!

I have countless videos where I approach girls who weren’t inviting in their dispositions yet as I open them, you would’ve never imagined that those charmingly social girls were the same chicks who before I approached, looked as though they were prepping to kill someone.


All in all guys:

*Don’t pass up on a girl due to her perceived coldness and frosty exterior.

*Approach the girls who would otherwise be seen as off limits by you.

*When in nightclubs and bars, approach and chat up the perceived “bitchy” girls.

On a final note, and this’ probably the most crucial piece of advice: please do NOT fucking listen to your friends!

Guy friends have a tendency to do 2 things:

1.) Talk you into talking to a girl who isn’t worth it.

2.) Talk you out of talking to a girl who’s worth it.

For instance:

You: “That girl is sexy as hell. I might go talk to her”!

Friend: “Are you crazy dude! That chick looks mean and stuck-up like she has an attitude! I wouldn’t talk to her ass”!

This is why I don’t do wingmen and I go out solo EVERYTIME.

I don’t want a Beta-Male mentality friend cramping my style with every girl I plan to approach while out. So if you have one of those guy friends who always try to talk you out of the approach or talk you out of taking chances in general: then ditch him until he starts to think differently!

This is 1 such video of mines which hammers home the concept of not being socially stifled, and also an infield clip where I approached a serious-faced chick sitting on a balcony of the bar/club.

No guys were approaching her so I took the initiative instead of being frozen by her uninviting and cold exterior…which quickly melted away as I approached and opened.


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