A kind of daunting question I get asked sometimes is this:
“Hey Kenny, the pick-up school of thought would have it a grave transgression for a man to ever buy anything for any woman! So- what gives”?
I get asked this question because guys would commonly see or hear me posting about paying for dinner [though I never do dinner dates], paying for the girl’s taxi fare, paying for drinks, etc.
Here is the deal: there’s a difference between buying a random stranger- a girl- a drink at the bar, and paying for snacks while on an official (or even unofficial) rendezvous.
You should NOT approach a stranger in the club and immediately look to buy her a drink: especially as your opener/ice-breaker [“may I buy you a drink”?].
However, if and when on a so-called date, there is absolutely nothing wrong in paying for dinner or drinks. Likewise, there is nothing wrong in having her pay for everything or go Dutch.
The dynamics and circumstances are what you should focus on when trying to discern bad-monetary investment from okay-monetary investment.
What do I mean?
Approaching a random girl at the bar and suggesting that you should buy her a drink within the first 2 minutes of conversation, would be a bad play in that the girl hasn’t done a thing to earn it.
Buying a girl something in such a context, should be seen on the basis of rewarding the girl for good behavior, or as a reward for advancing your cause and aim: whether that be good conversation, getting a number or sex.
If a girl whom you’d approached at the bar is being a snobby bitch, why would you ever in your right mind entertain the idea to offer to buy her a drink!?
She hasn’t earned it on the basis of her stink attitude!
Most guys however, would still reward a woman for negative behavior, under the impression that if they say to her, “Can I buy you a drink”, it would placate the girl and iron out her attitude. Hence, he’s rewarding her for bad behavior, and essentially training her wrong.
If anything, you want to reward a girl for good behavior and for working in the interest of your aim.
For example (and this is how I do it): girl shows up to meet me at the designated location, I would buy her a drink/soda or a bite to eat as a reward for her actually keeping her word in showing up. Obviously I wouldn’t be that inept to disclose this with her.
In any case, I basically operate on such a basis.
If the girl does something that I find to be progressing and accelerating the chances of me getting my pecker into her vagina; she gets rewarded!
I would buy her a drink.
More popularly, if a girl agrees to come see me, I may pay her cab fare as an incentive.
Psychologically, such insignificant acts lift the burden (psychologically) off of women, thus making you appear in a more favorable light to them…though the act was insignificant in the grand scheme of things.
If a girl has 2nd thoughts about coming to see me, or let’s say that she lives pretty far and a bus ride would take too long, I would suggest to her that she should take a taxi on me.
Not only will this shorten the trip time for her, but it is also less hectic than to be on a crowded bus and it gets her right to my doorstep.
I offer girls incentives, stimuli and concessions for coming to see me.
We all do this for that matter!
Some guys may even cook a meal for the girl who is to come over. I find this to be way too much investment. Plus it is actually counterproductive in the sense that a woman won’t likely have sex on a filled stomach while feeling bloated. I’ll address this folly in a future article.
Prior to the girl coming over for the 1st time, I would buy ice cream, alcohol, non-alcoholic beverages (juice and soda) and have a snack or 2 at my place (or the hotel).
I essentially lure them to my place with the promise of alcohol or ice cream…and it usually works.
Cooking a meal for a girl who isn’t your girlfriend is highly ridiculous.
On a further note, it all comes down to logistics, intelligence and from where you operate as the guy.
The reason why in pickup we teach you guys that you should NOT buy girls shit, nor pay for their stuff, is simply to avoid a situation where you- the guy- gets tooled out, lose value and have the girl perceive you to be a kiss-ass who goes around trying to buy women. Also, by doing this, you will have inadvertently attracted lots of gold-diggers to your party.
Hence, it is sound advice to not buy stuff for a woman unless she is your girlfriend…or at least someone whom you’d already slept with.
On the flip side; I still pay for stuff and buy stuff for women [by “buying”, I mean an insignificant drink or pizza].
The reason why doing so doesn’t DLV me [become a negative or makes me look like I’m trying to buy her] is because I operate from a place of higher value in any situation.
Women are turned off by men who try to buy them, by their love or their vagina.
Therefore, going up to a girl at the bar and within seconds suggesting to buy her a drink, will put you in the “he thinks he can buy my pussy” bracket.
She may very well accept the fucking drink! But you won’t get laid at the end of the night!
In fact, the girl will likely try to dodge you out just to avoid you, since guys are in the habit of buying drinks while believing that the girl is indebted to them, hence she must talk to them all night.
I see that shit play out every week at the bars and lounges which I frequent [chicks running from guys who had bought them drinks].
This is all because the guy gets lumped into the “he thinks he will fuck me because he bought me a drink” crowd.
However, I never get perceived in such a way whenever I buy a girl a drink because of various factors mentioned earlier. But I always operate from a position of high value and strategically so.
Hence, it isn’t that paying for stuff is such a terrible idea. Your hidden agendas are what screw it up for you.
When I buy a girl a drink, she doesn’t get the sense that I’m trying to buy my way into her panties nor trying to get her drunk.
She gets the sense that I’m rewarding her for her compliance and agreeableness (though I don’t need to).
Furthermore, guys need to also realize that there is a fine line between trying to be Alpha and being stupid by blunting your own opportunities.
I encounter fellow PUA’s (online that is) who try so darn hard to be Alpha that they foolishly kill their chances by refusing to pay for the girl’s cab fare over to their place.
The girl subsequently backs out, feeling that the least the guy could’ve done was to pay for the ride.
At the end of the day, no one gets laid…except the girl who could’ve likely gotten dick elsewhere at will. So the guy loses out for being a tightwad.
With that, you don’t want to sacrifice your lays while trying to remain “Alpha”.
Learn to give a little. And by “give” I mean to bend and yield, especially when the situation profits you in the end game.
If you wants the girl to come and hang out with you and she gets on board, feel free to ask her if she wants something to munch on.
Throw these little incentives and inducements out there!
Don’t go over board with grand proposals! Keep it light and simple.
There’s a reason why I always opt for drinks at my hotel, drinks at an eatery joint, or drinks wherever it is I’m to meet up with a girl.
In any case; I prefer drinks be involved.
Is it because I want to get the girl inebriated and date rape her?
Of course not you sick fuckers!
Why I always try to ensure that alcohol be present [even if we barely consume it] is for “Plausible Justifiability” purposes.
Plausible Justifiability [let’s just say “PJ” in the interest of time] in its rawest definition, is an excuse; a would-be plausible excuse for some sort of action taken- in this case- by the girl in the equation.
Therefore, alcohol acts as justification [plausibly so] in the girl’s mind, whereas if she sleeps with Joe Blow, having consumed some alcohol, she can justify said action [fucking Joe Blow] by saying to herself [and others], “I was under the influence. I had a few drinks”.
This will not only give her comfort and justification in her actions, but others will excuse her, since after all, having consumed alcohol is a plausible reason for fucking some random guy.
She is justified in being slutty!
Without alcohol present- let us say on the date- there must be something else [likely unknown to the guy] which the girl can latch onto, claim Justifiability, then sleep with the guy.
Therefore, not having alcohol, and not consuming any, will only make the guy’s attempt for sex that much more difficult…unless there are drugs involved, or other mind-altering agents.
Here’s the thing- and I have no personal experience with this since I don’t smoke anything at all- but judging from what I see and stories that I’ve heard, it is much easier to sleep with a girl while she’s under the influence or high…basically.
I don’t believe it requires rocket-science to see the obvious logics in such a statement: that a girl who’s high will have been more susceptible and easier persuaded towards sex.
Now, here is the thing- and here is where I pontificate with my own theory on the drugs and sex connection: it isn’t the drug or alcohol itself [their content] that makes the girl pliable and easier, but “Plausible Justifiability” in the girl’s mind which facilitates her actions to go along with sex.
Though the girl may have knowingly been under the influence of whatever it is she consumed or ingested, that alone would not have tipped the scales towards sex with the guy who’s there, partaking in the act of inebriation or getting high along with her.
The effects of alcohol do NOT lead to sex!
The effects of drugs do NOT lead to sex neither!
Again- this is my hypothesis.
However, there is no proof of this, and no way possible to prove this as factual [that drugs and alcohol consumption chemically induce sex].
Why this may seem so is simply as I explained above: having consumed alcohol or drugs, women more specifically, justify to themselves why doing something they otherwise wouldn’t do, would be justified plausibly. Not only to herself, but to others on the outside…and to the guy who may have slept with her.
Hence, it isn’t the content of the alcohol or drug that pushes a girl towards sex.
She leads herself into that action while justifying it by being under the influence of something other than herself.
Thus, she cannot be held responsible for her actions.
If it was really so, that alcohol and drugs actually lowers one’s inhibitions and pushes him or her into having sex besides their own will, then why aren’t women who drink and do drugs, for example sake, sleeping with any random guy they come across on the subway, streets, bars, nightclubs, parties or over Thanksgiving dinner?
Why isn’t horny Tina, who has had a few drinks at the family reunion, hooking up with uncle Bob who’s been fondling her ever since she was 10 years old, and wanting to shove his old-dirty pecker inside of her?
Why aren’t women under the influence walking down the street naked, fingering themselves on the park benches or at restaurants, letting themselves go while under the influence of something?
Why not? Because they [we] still have the vast bulk of control over their actions and thoughts while under the influence. So that is why we aren’t just blowing our brains out at random after downing a few cocktails. Even the hardest drugees know better than to dive off of a 10 story building, being driven and controlled by whichever drug they had shot up.
The most sex-deprived guys on Earth, or even virgin men who’ve never tasted poon, aren’t downing booze or doping up, to then stagger around town raping random chicks all about the place!
No one does this sober, nor under the influence for that matter, because the risk outweighs the reward.
Additionally, no matter how horny a girl is, being under the influence won’t at all drive her to ripping off the male bartender’s pants and fucking him right then and there!
She has control! Not only some. But she has full control of her actions!
Whether drunk or high: we know right from wrong, and we do right most of the time, even while under the influence! Or else, there would be mass casualties at bars and nightclubs all around the world, where drunk guy kills other guys for checking out his girlfriend…then jumps off a bridge while at it.
You get the point, right?
We still have actionable and mental control over what we do and say while under the influence.
With all that which was said, and in relation to dating, women justify their actions to have sex with a new guy by placing responsibility upon anything other than themselves.
She’ll even lay blame upon the guy who had fucked her!
If you’re a guy who has any sort of intelligence about females, you would accept every ounce of responsibility for the sex: prior to, and after the sex.
Whether you as the man accepts responsibility for the sex or not, the girl will always lay blame on you for it having happened.
She doesn’t want to be perceived as slutty [a woman’s greatest fear].
This is why she will blame the guy, alcohol or drugs for having coerced her into the act of sex.
Without a doubt- she fucked the guy on her own volition- even if she had a drink or 2, smoked some weed or snorted some cocaine! But she needs a source/outlet of “Plausible Justifiability” upon which to cast the blame.
The following may not be a popular declaration, but I’ve made it before without trepidation: I personally believe that a fair amount of rape cases was actually false-rape accusation, alleged by the female involved.
She might have wanted sex, and even verbally consented to it, but for whatever reason [a bitter fallout for instance], she subsequently decides to call foul/rape.
This is also common among collegiate-level athletes, where subsequent to gang-banging a chick at a campus function, the girl- though she was a willing participant- because of shame, or perhaps she felt threatened that the guys would go public about the romp [remember this is a girl’s #1 fear], she decides to call foul about the entire incident.
Perhaps 1 of the jocks involved was an ex-fling. Now the girl feels shitty about herself, so she confronts the guy about the gang-bang but she was blown off and made fun of. Girl then decides to go public [as in report the incident to authorities] as rape, and not that she was a willing participant in the orgy.
These things happen on and off of campus, at parties, concerts, etc.
This however hearkens back to my previous point that women will rarely ever take personal responsibility for having sex [this is with a new guy]. They were either drunk [or drinking], high [or smoking], pressured or raped: alcohol, drugs and men get the blame.
As the man- if you were wise- you would want to take the burden of responsibility for sex happening [I definitely don’t mean in the cases of false-rape accusations nor anything egregious].
A woman [mainly one whom you haven’t bedded yet] will NOT go through with sex, if she, even for a split second, feels that the burden will be left with her.
This is where alcohol comes in to save the day as far as my methodology of getting laid is concerned.
Make no mistake about it: I do NOT have to have alcohol handy in order to get laid.
It is used solely as a psychological red herring.
In fact, I don’t even keep alcohol at my place as most guys do.
Yea- so- basically, having a drink or 2 while on the date or meet-up, will have created a dynamic where the girl uses “Plausible Justifiability” in order to coerce herself into having guilt-free sex…which she wants to have anyway, but she only needs an external source in which to lay blame…in this case: the alcohol.
Furthermore, we’re all familiar with stories of girls getting hammered and going wild: letting go of their inhibitions.
What if I were to tell you that this is just a ruse: a sham, and that the girl-gone-wild while under the influence, isn’t because of the alcohol at all, but that she really intended to go wild anyways, but only used the pretence of alcohol as a smoke-screen for “Plausible Justifiability” to justify her actions of going wild and getting slutty?
Well- that is the truth…at least my theorization on it.
Chicks often consume alcohol in order to use “alcohol” as the culprit for their capricious behavior. Not that the alcohol was ever a true influence, but she only used it as such while creating that impression to observers…or to the guy she’s hoping to have sex with.
Men are also guilty of this shit, however, not to justify having sex, but aggression.
We would drink [or get high] just to show aggression, start a fight or to do something even more egregious.
Not that the alcohol transformed us into an aggressive beast of a man by injecting us with a dose of liquid courage. But we “CONSCIOUSLY” justify our acts of aggression- like bashing a guy over the head with a beer bottle- while using alcohol, drugs or being under the influence as the reason of justification for said actions.
It is all bullshit!
We consciously do our wrongs and good deeds. And we have FULL control over whether we do them or elect not to do them [whatever “them” may be].
I mean- such actions are even legally justified to a considerable extent by the judiciary.
Someone who had committed a crime while “claiming” to have been under the influence of some substance, can justifiably claim that he wasn’t [fully] responsible for having committed that offense. And the law will likely take that claim into consideration, more so once the person’s legal council makes this known within the proceedings. There are provisions within the law [Westminster system that is] which have to take this into account.
The only offense in which the judiciary does not accept “I was under the influence” claim [at least in America], is driving while under the influence which may have resulted in an accident or vehicular homicide. The law does not show leniency towards an assailant’s claims of being under the influence of a controlled substance [alcohol] in such cases.
Therefore, alcohol [or drugs] often times gets culpability for one’s actions: legally, socially and sexually.
My well thought-out hypothesis remains as mentioned earlier: those “supposed” controlled substances aren’t responsible for one’s action, nor do they truly compel nor sandbag one into action. But we only lay blame on such external substances in order to avoid taking personal responsibility for our not-so palatable actions…like committing crime, breaking laws, sleeping with someone we barely know and so forth.
The so-called professionals and experts in this field [substance abuse] would likely disagree with my theory here, because they truly believe that someone who’s been drinking or is high, is considerably under the influence and control of something other than himself/herself.
Again, I disagree with the so-called experts. Because if this was truly the case- that alcohol and drugs “TRULY” control our actions- then those of us who drink and get high [I only drink] would be careening to our deaths on a wholesale daily basis in highly irrational fashion: jumping from bridges and skyscrapers, instigating an unprovoked shootout with an entire police precinct, violently storming an army barrack as a civilian itching for a fight, catapulting ourselves into the middle of oncoming traffic…on the highway.
If we were truly under the influence and power of any substance outside of ourselves, we would be doing some crazy-fucking shit…REGULARLY!
Thus, there is a limitation and boundary, or something within us [which is our ration-thinking mind], which tells us that diving through the window of a 10-story building, will not be a smart idea…hence we elect not to do so…even when drunk or high. BUT- while drunk or high, shouldn’t we technically become irrational and highly liable to do irrational shit?
Therefore, how can we truly claim “I acted under the influence”, or “I was controlled”, when we are rational and mindful enough to not do anything as stupid as jumping in front of a speeding train…even while under the influence?
You may respectfully disagree with my thesis here. I’m cool with that!
Certainly these irrational actions happen somewhat with regularity! But they aren’t committed by any sane person who might have had a few drinks or snorted some coke. Crazy people, who are truly acting outside of their logical minds, are the ones running into oncoming traffic, laying themselves on a railroad while a freight train chugs along, diving from a building, etc.
They have no control!
However, don’t tell me that a rational-thinking person deciding to strip their clothes off at a party, is doing so because he/she is being controlled by a substance, having downed a few Tequila shots or snorted a line of coke.
I would hazard a very good guess that the person decided to strip at the party because that person wanted to do it anyway! But he or she had only used alcohol or drugs as pretext to justify their actions…of stripping at the party for example.
Anyway, so when you adjoin everything together which I’d touched upon within this article [“Plausible Justifiability”], and apply it to women in courtship, mating and dating, you will have gotten a very very precise picture of how and why women operate the way they do while claiming to be “under the influence”, and how and why I prefer to have alcohol present in order to feed into this myth, and encourage the girl to want to hook up.
If she believes that alcohol makes her horny [I’ve come across many girls who hold this belief]- FINE- I’ll bring some, or invite her on a rendezvous with alcohol being handy.
Surely there is no real study which shows that alcohol makes one sexually aroused. But the girl buys into this myth because it suits her hidden agenda of wanting to have sex while needing something upon which to cast blame and culpability [the alcohol] so she doesn’t appear slutty for conceding to sexual intercourse with the new guy on her own free will while sober.
She truly wants sex! But she won’t ever admit this unless she’s been drinking or getting high.
Get her to drink, it increases the chances of her having sex. Not because the alcohol is in control of her actions, but she needs the alcohol as a source of blame for her “conscious” decision and action to have sex.
Lastly, women will often excuse a man’s behavior while he’s “under the influence”.
This is secretly why guys who drink and pretend to be intoxicated, get aggressive and sexual with women.
They consciously know what the fuck they’re doing!
The so-called drunk guy at the bar [he may very well be drunk] is consciously aware of his actions of trying to grope or kiss some random woman in the venue.
He’s also aware of the fact that because he’s been drinking, others will excuse his actions by saying, “Oh- he was drunk”! Hence, he rids himself of culpability/blame.
He would not have attempted this act while sober [trying to make out with a girl] because he doesn’t have the cover of alcohol to hide behind as plausible justifiability. But by no means is the drunk guy unaware of his actions, except in the cases where he doesn’t quite have full conscious control of his limbs [particularly the legs]. Hence, a guy who’s pissy drunk is liable to trip or stumble over himself. But it doesn’t at all mean that his wants, desires and intentions aren’t clear to him.
In any case, people will often excuse our actions once we’ve been drinking.
This can turn out to be a positive or negative depended on the situation and the results.
For instance, if on a date having wine with a girl whom you’ve never gotten intimate with before, and you decide to escalate physically and sexually by caressing her hands sensually; in most cases, she isn’t likely to react negatively…especially if she’s been wanting this to happen.
She will excuse your intimate escalation by telling herself, “he’s had a bit much to drink”. Having been drinking some wine herself, she is likely to accept your physical and sexual escalation under the guise of intoxication.
Thus, she’s pleased to give her date the impression that the wine had made her pliable, easy and receptive to his sexual advances.
This is why it puzzles the shit out of me that guys can take a girl out, 2-4 dates, have wine or cocktails, yet not get intimate with her at all.
Dude- the alcohol is your goddamn ally! Your date expects you to escalate having been drinking! But you constantly blow it by being a giant pussy!
The girl is more than likely to excuse your actions and blame it on the alcohol!
What is the worse that could possible happen by taking your date’s hand and trying to sensually caress her fingers?
She either tells you to stop, pulls away, calls for the bill, pays for her stuff and leave!
Worse case scenario!
You won’t die!
You won’t even collapse from a nervous breakdown!
What the hell is there to lose?
On that note, I want you to realize that almost everything I do as far as women and dating are concerned, is logistically strategic in hopes of getting me inside of her little-pink flesh.
Do I always get laid from my rendezvous and so-called dates?
However, I believe in maximizing my chances of getting laid by being strategic and using psychology to facilitate sex.
Though I may not leave from every so-called date having had sex with the girl. But you best believe that getting physical, making out, mutual groping, etc. will have undoubtedly taken place 100% of the time…even though the meet-up may not have culminated in sex.
Furthermore, whenever I introduce alcohol into the picture, it is NEVER with the intention to get the girl drunk in the least!
In fact, I have a 1-drink policy [2 if she’s lucky] where I get her 1 drink, and 1 for myself also [2 if I’m feeling generous 😉 ]. So, my intention isn’t to get the girl nor myself inebriated. I just want enough alcohol [1 glass or 1 bottle will suffice] to create the impression that we both are buzzed, hence she gets to give herself justification for allowing me to physically and sexually escalate upon her.
Not that she’s actually buzzed or tipsy [for crying out loud; she would have only had 1 drink]! But the impression is the most important factor here.
At the end of the meet-up, if sex does happen, she can rationalize it to herself [and to me indirectly] that it wasn’t her conscious decision to fuck me [while sober], but the alcohol made her fuck me…even though she only had 1 drink and was completely operating from a sober frame regardless.
It’s all psychological guys.
Now, imagine this: on your so-called date, you grab for yourself and the girl water or juice [anything nonalcoholic]. What is there to now give the girl [false] justification to allow you to get intimate with her, without her recoiling or drawing herself back because she’s uncomfortable?
I hope you’re following.
If the girl had only drunk water, juice or had tea [non-intoxicants], why would she fuck you?
What would have been her “plausible justification”?
Are the cranberries in the juice aphrodisiacs? Not that I know of.
Hence, you are liable to receive a “WTF is he doing” look as you escalate on your date in the absence of alcohol.
Now, I’m not saying you can’t sleep with a new girl for the first time without having drinks [alcohol]. Half of my lays have happened without any drinks involved. However, it only complicates things a bit [not having alcohol] whereas the easiest avenue to achieving sex [having alcohol] is inadvertently sealed off, which means you’ll have to revert to a plan b or c.
By the way, this quasi tip is more so directed at the guys who suffer from social anxiety and have escalation issues.
If you’re comfortable, confident and adept at making a move on women [as I am], then you can very well escalate and get sexual with your date without trepidation of anything going South [as in real objections]. Having to need alcohol as a psychological crutch will not be that necessary.
Where and how guys find themselves in sticky situations like date-rape and so on, is by trying [intentionally] to get the girl drunk by buying drink after drink, or trying to take advantage of the situation [the girl] while she’s already pissy or black-out drunk.
I mean, chicks aren’t stupid. They know when you’re intending to get them drunk and capitalize off of the perceived handicap.
In lots of cases, the guy ends up forcing himself upon the girl, believing that she’s had enough drinks and is now incoherent, so he forces the issue, the girl resists [knowing that she’s been duped] the guy persists, then everything blows up in everyone’s face.
To avoid such a dumb situation that lots of guys get themselves into, I adhere to my 1-2 drink policy, and the girl will have had no reason whatsoever to believe that I was attempting to get her drunk and take advantage of her. After all; why would I only buy 1-2 drinks if I had villainous intentions like to date rape her via intoxication?
Be as it may, in a future article, I’ll deal with the topic of strategic logistics and how I structure my dates in order to maximize the chances of sex.
If you haven’t seen my 36 minute hidden-cam date video from earlier in the year [with a girl I picked up online], I suggest you check it out to see some of the concepts I talked about here being put into action.
Whenever I’m strolling through a high-end joint [like The Coast Nightclub & Diamond Ice on the island of Antigua], or even a local bar like Yankee Tavern in the Bronx…1 thing you’d readily notice (besides the Mohawk), which separates me from the chodes: I have an exotic-colorful drink in my hand!
Yankee Tavern Bar in the South Bronx
Now I know “colorful” drinks don’t appeal to the Alpha’s who’re reading this- but I can explain!
What will NOT attract women [drink wise]:
•Strangling a bottle/can of Old Milwaukee, Coors or Guinness will NOT.
•A bland cup/mug of piss-colored liquid [beer] will NOT do you any favors neither.
•Ordering beer,wine or champagne will not cut it neither (when it comes to baiting women into talking to you).
“Women And Colors”
•Women are stimulated and captivated by colors and colorful things [unlike most men]: roses, clothing, hats, shoes, etc.
•Same goes for drinks.Women go bonkers over Apple Martinis, Margaritas, Sex On The Beach, Tequila Sunrises…
•The key ingredients to those colorful-attractive drinks are: Schnapps, Syrup (Grenadine) & Liqueurs.
•As an aspiring bartender (mixologist), and a guy who’s spent a billion hours in nightclubs and bars; I got a pretty good sense of what hot chics order.
•But if you’re a self-conscious guy, and you’d feel like a giant pussy ordering Margaritas & Sex On The Beach- here’s what you can do:
•Order what you would regularly [beer, rum and coke, whiskey], but tell the bartender to dash some color in there (preferably schnapps).
•You now have a colorful, exotic-looking drink.
Kenny’s “Exotic-Drink” Routine/Technique
•Two things will either happen (in response to your colorful drink):
1.) Women nearby will open you(initiate a chat) by saying:
“What are you drinking”?
“Hey, what drink is that”?
“Wow, that drink looks pretty”!
•I’ve had either, or all 3 of those responses each time I’m holding a colorful drink [it’s like some Voodoo charm lol].
2.) You can take the initiative (as you should as a man) and open the target by saying anything:
“Hey, I want some of what you’re having”!
•In return, she will most likely notice your drink (the exotic color), and make a comment on it:
“I want some of what you’re having”!
“What are you drinking”!?
Example Of How SocialKenny Rolls His “Exotic-Drink” Routine:
Now, let’s say there’s a hot 2-set @ the bar counter ordering drinks, or just bored to death of the losers so they chose to prop up the bar.
I’d approach the counter and order my signature cocktail: •Malibu coconut rum,
•Splash of Grenadine syrup (to give it a red-orange look).
I’d make sure that the girls standing/sitting beside me overhear or see me ordering [telling the Bartender how to mix my drink].
[Girls can appreciate a man who knows his spirits and mixing drinks. This’ why bartenders get laid and are attractive to women].
When the bartender hands me my colorful cocktail, the chics next to me are usually eyeballing it, which @ that point, I’d say something to them like:
“The 1st. one to taste my “COCKTAIL” gets a free drink”!
Nine out of 10 times, they will either make 1 of the following responses:
•Have a shocked yet playful face
•Take the 1st. sip for me
Then it’s game on from there!!
•Google an exotic-looking drink.
•Order it @ a bar/club.
•Make sure women can hear or see you place the order.
•Open them (or her) by saying: “I give you $100 bucks if you taste my COCKTAIL”.
•Walk the venue until you spot a hot girl.
•Say to her: “I want some of what you’re having”.
•Flaunt your colorful drink in the her face (baiting her to comment on it).
The rest is now up to you with your standard Game.
My “Exotic-Drink Routine” was just to entice, impress (in a good way) and open her.
Whenever I’m @ the bar,I’m always “THE” guy to captivate women by what I’m drinking.
I’d usually have a 4-set (4 girls) all surrounding me as I bust on them for drinking bland shit.
Amazing Alcohol to an Alpha tag and super-social experience:
Back again guys and girls. In this entry, I’m going to talk about drinks [alcoholic and non-alcoholic].
How they can positively affect you (surprising to some) and the negatives. Along with my personal favourites and how they came about.
As a PUA, Im learning how to become closer to that Alpha-male tag, which would naturally help draw attention.
I started to consume alcohol that usually taste different and looked different from what most people would buy at a bar.
It definitely works!
I’d often be greeted and asked questions regarding what I’m drinking and how the taste was: usually resulting in “Can I have a taste (Mostly by women)”?
For PUA’s or generally shy people (MALES and FEMALES), starting out it’s a great thing to do. It definitely eases “Approach Anxiety” and often brings a target in for the first move.
So you can then progress from there.
It’s just a small method of slowly building your inner-self. And over time, will help you feel more confident socialising (especially with the other sex).
It’s funny when you’re near a group, and you ask for a drink they’ve never heard of or experienced ;).
It opens doors without even trying. Give it a go!
Vodka + Sugar free Red Bull – For some reason I can drink huge amounts and not get drunk or even tipsy.
Jack Daniel’s and Sugar free Red Bull : JD always hits the spot for me, it gets me tipsy (not drunk) but the caffeine and Taurine from the Red Bull keep me SO alert- I’m on top of my game. It’s like an adrenaline rush for short period after the drink.
Always works when I’m not 100%.
Barnamint Bailey’s: A mix of Bailey’s, mint liqeur, vanilla flavoured ice cream, crushed ice and Oreo cookies.
This is my favourite at the moment. The design and rare purchase from what I’ve seen makes me stand out with it.
Often being asked questions by women about what it is, and can they have a taste?
As a PUA it’s fuel for the fire :)!
CJ aka Cranberry Juice
Cranberry Juice is also one of my favourites. Sometimes with Vodka, but mostly alone.
Cranberries are full of antioxidants which protects cells from damage by unstable molecules called free radicals.
They also help keep the brain alert.
I usually drink this if I’m feeling under the weather at home or out having a good time.
They also help prevent urinary infections which are very common in people nowadays.
So a bit of Cranberry juice can stop any possible hinders on your sex life!
B52 [cocktail shot, that was introduced to me by a Lithuanian girl working in my Favourite bar in London].
We became good friends (after which improved my rep to many regulars and her friends).
It’s my favourite shot because of the way it’s so beautifully crafted and presented. Most people know nothing about it..
The B-52 (also B52 or Bifi) is a layered shot composed of a coffee liqueur (Kahlúa), an Irish Cream (Baileys Irish Cream), and a triple sec (Grand Marnier).
When prepared properly, the ingredients separate into three distinctly visible layers.
The layering is due to the relative densities of the ingredients. (Explanation from wiki)
Benefits of Alcohol:
Alcohol consumed in moderation is thought to help reduce the risk of heart disease.
Indeed, alcohol consumption in conjunction with high intakes of fruit and vegetables may well explain the so-called ‘French paradox’.
The French diet is considered to be very high in fat, especially saturated fat, yet the death rate from coronary heart disease (CHD) remains relatively low.
Research studies from 1992 have proved these facts.
I have heard and spoken to many experts regarding Red Wine. Red Wine contains flavonoids that act as antioxidants, which help to reduce the build up of atherosclerosis (when fat builds up on the inner walls of arteries).
Red wine seems to help maintain the flexibility of the blood vessel walls.
I won’t go into too much detail because 99% of people who have consumed Alcohol have been warned usually from a young age.
But remember; alcohol abuse can cause severe damage to organs that help maintain healthy life and general survival- most notably the Liver.
Go out, have a good time on the weekends, but do not BINGE DRINK!
Go figure; my first post of the year is about getting twisted and hammered off some exotic-looking cocktails…well not actually hammered but tipsy at least.
What good is a PUA if he doesn’t have good taste in mixed drinks [goes hand in hand right]?
Oh yea, I have to plug my girl Tia for inspiring this post. I’ve been neglecting blogging about alcohol, so when I came across Tia’s article on a pomegranate-based Martini [check it out here], I was instantly struck with a rush of inspiration.
Ok, let’s get it cracking like a dozen eggs!
Whenever I’m rolling in the club or bar, Alpha-swag on high, getting ready to swoop down on my harmless-feminine prey like a hawk on a barn rat [ok bad metaphor]: if I’m not toting a glass of Malibu Coconut Rum with PJ and a splash of Grenadine, I’d most likely have a Tequila Sunrise.
Now, I can already hear macho guys saying, “Hey Kenny, you’re fucking soft bro’! That’s a girl drink! Agreed! But a cocktail with an exquisite look to it is just ‘oh-so attractive’. Kind of like a well-dressed chic compared to a not-so well-dressed girl [y’all get the picture].
Anyway, I’m too fucking lazy right now to post the recipe, so I’m gonna leave it up to y’all to google the ingredients if interested.
The added benefits to a great-tasting cocktail is the ability to open a set (of girls) and instantly hook them via what’s in your glass. I cannot begin to count the amount of times I’m gaming a girl at the bar and she INSTANTLY becomes intrigued by my Tequila Sunrise! That shit is like chic-crack!! Sure separates you from the guy who’s holding a bottle Heineken.
If you wanna attract some hot girls at whichever venue you’re at: just tell the camarero(bartender) to mix you a glass of Tequila Sunrise. And if they don’t know the simple ingredients: request to see the manager to get their ass fired [just kidding]!
After writing 2 previous articles a while back on ‘drinks’ [you can check it out here:How does she earn a drink from me], it’s only right to share some examples of the dos and don’ts on this matter.
Plus it’s the holiday season and a lot of guys are usually drink-happy: willing to empty their wallets just for mediocre conversation.
This is my first-actual strategic post or routines in other words. So I’m pretty psyched to offer some stuff that guys can actually apply at the clubs and bars.
# 1 rule in Game: It’s not what you say: it’s how you say it.
With that in mind: routines, openers and lines, will NOT work if your vibe, tone & energy arent congruent.
One can literally approach a girl at the bar and say, “I hate you sooooo much…”, and still manage to attract her and pique her interest if his tonality is alpha and he has a sly-cocky smile to accompany his verbals.
Ok, assuming I’d already approached and opened the girl, and we’ve been having a decent chat for the last 15 minutes, this is what I’d do if I were in a Santa Clause-type mood [pertaining to drinks]:
Me: “Lol, hey you’re such a friggin’ rockstar, I’m starting to think you’re too good to be true. But I can’t take a chic like you home to my parent though”!
Girl:” What lol! Whats that supposed to mean?
Me: “Bla,bla,bla…Hey I’m thirsty as hell. I’m gonna get me a rum & coke. Since you’ve been such a Bad Girl, I’m gonna go against my rules and buy you a drink. What you want?
Note: At this point, a real Alpha and a confident/cool guy would take her by the hand, waist or shoulder and lead her to the bar.
For those who aren’t that confident and they lack the balls to pull it off: it’s ok to go alone to get the drinks.
Breaking it down:
Why are such moves and lines so critical in trying to seduce a girl?
As I said in my previous post: it subcommunicates to the girl that I’m:
*And most of all ‘Different’
Women are Super attracted to guys who display the above qualities.
Women are attracted to men who are challenging and ballsy [as we all know by now].
Whenever a guy goes up to a girl and the first shit that comes out of his mouth is this, “What’s up girl? I’ve been checking you out. You chilling? You want something to drink”?
He instantaneously kills all possibility of he being a challenge.
In other words, he turns the girl off since she hadn’t done shit to deserve a drink.
Women want to know that they’ve earned and worked for your interest.
Another key point:
*telling the girl that, “I’m going against my rules by buying a drink”. That says to the girl subconsciously, that she’s special.
He doesn’t normally treat girls to anything, so for him to go against his rules for her: she must be deserving of it.
Now that’s how you compliment a girl!
You never want to compliment a girl verbally nor directly [unless you are a proponent of direct game].
Compliments should be indirect and under the radar.
Compliments should be vague and hard to read.
The more obvious you are when complimenting: the less the girl will appreciate it.
With that said, remember to be challenging, ballsy and different! Not boring as the last 10 guys who had approach her.
And the rule still stands: Do Not buy her a drink! But this is just an exception depending on how good the vibe goes.
Ok guys, if y’all haven’t read part 1 to this topic: click the link Here to check it out
When is it OK to buy her a drink?
As the title suggests; the girl whom you’re chatting up at the bar or club HAS to EARN it.
This is a classic concept in the pick-up community dubbed Rewarding her.
Listen clearly! The only time you should buy her a drink is if she’s worked for it, and you’re essentially REWARDING her.
Do not reward bad behavior!
How many times have we seen a guy chatting up a girl, and she’s clearly not interested (via body language), nor engaged in the chat [i.e. Bad Behavior], yet the he still initiates buying her a drink!
That is essentially rewarding her for bad behavior. Or for anti-social behavior.
Why would you reward someone who hasn’t done anything to deserve it!!?
Women are so used to being rewarded by Beta males when they don’t deserve it, that they virtually expect every guy to do the same.
We can all thank the Betas/nice guys for setting this awful trend(SMFH).
Grounds for rewarding her
Ok, the reason guys chat up girls is to get laid (eventually). No secret in that.
Accordingly, whatever the girl does to facilitate the possible lay, or if she’s just enjoying the time y’all are spending. Feel free to reward her with a drink.
The fact that she’s been so receptive and reciprocative to you and the chat (opposed to being a first-class bitch), somewhere during the chat (15 minutes after), I may say to her:
“Hey Marcy, I’m gonna get ‘MYSELF’ a drink. Since you’ve been such a fucking rockstar, I’m gonna get you one too. Let’s go to the bar”!
The subtle beauty in what I said is this:
*I made it clear that ‘I’ was gonna buy ‘MYSELF’ a drink. And I’m in such a good mood that I’m considering getting you on. But I come first.
That is very fucking powerful guys!
It subcommunicates to the girl that “you’re more important than she is” [who’s just a stranger].
As we already know, that mindset and frame is a crucial part of the alpha lifestyle.
And women LOVE Alphas and men who are dominant and confident with a touch of asshole mixed in there.
What I stated to her is what separates real men from boys.
An Alpha always puts himself before any random woman.
While betas/wussies put the woman first: aka pedestalling [which is a grave sin in the seduction community].
Women are attracted to dominance and high-valued men! Their panties get super friggin’ drenched by guys who display such behavior!
A guy CANNOT be high value, if he’s going around the club rewarding girls who haven’t invested anything into an interaction.
Women see such actions as weak, supplicative and sly!
So once the girl has invested in the conversation by actually talking for more than 15 minutes, she has essentially earned any good acts you’re willing to perform.
On the contrary, if you’re trying to social and converse with her, but she’s not responding, not talking much, being a bitch, being indifferent, not smiling, obviously not enjoying the time…Why the fuck would you even contemplate rewarding such bitchy behavior!?
And the sickening thing is: Most men would STILL reward her (or attempt to) by buying her a drink !!!
It’s as if the guy say to himself, “you know what, she’s acting a bit frosty right now, so I’m gonna buy her a drink”.
Hoping that will activate her conversational motors.
Once a woman sees you’re rewarding her shitty behavior, she will take advantage (if she’s that kinda girl).
She will drink your ass out while pretending to be enjoying the chat, just to have your ass running back and forth to the bar like a damn waiter!
Then she’s gonna introduce you to her social group, and you’re gonna find yourself feeling compelled to buy drinks for her girlfriends too!!!
Guys, we’ve all seen this shit play out every weekend at venues.
We’ve all probably been there and been that looser guy.
That guy rushing to the bar then returning to the set with 4 cocktails in hands: praying not to spill them.
That sought of behavior is WEAK and a turnoff to women.
And how ironic that 95% of men in clubs and bars act this way: committing such ridiculous social faux-pas.
So you never want to put yourself in a situation where the girl has you buying drinks for her girlfriends: which is quite common nowadays (SMH).
That is why I appreciate the pick-up community and our insights so much.
The guru/head coach for RSD (Real Social Dynamics),Tyler Durden, once wrote an article years ago entitled “Secret Society”.
He went on as to say that, “Only 5% of men in the world get laid regularly. And in the club: only 5% of the men in the venue will actually get laid”.
The reality that guys are in the bars and clubs doing dumb shit, like buying girls drinks when they haven’t earned it. I can picture now what TD meant by that.
Hard Truth In Closing:
Women are 100 times more socially savvy that us.
Women are 100 times more socially aware than us.
Women are 100 times more perceptive than us.
So if you’re scheming, plotting and contemplating buying drinks: Know that the girl knows the only reason you’re doing it is to buy your way into her pants.
Thus, she will either reject you now by turning down your drink proposal.
Or she will accept your drinks, use you all night as her drink-provider, then reject you later.
So we cannot blame women for being gold-diggers. We can only blame the men who readily offer them gold.
Once again, chec out this interesting article about buying drinks from a female’s perspective: imma buy you a drank
Hey fellaz, another really interesting post which correlates with bar/club game (that is: picking up girls in those venues).
Very informative for guys who enjoy going out and having fun in the nightlife.
First off, let’s address the EXCEPTIONS to buying her drinks:
* You already know her, i.e. she’s a relative, former fuck buddy (ex-girlfriend), acquaintant, etc.
* She’s a girl in whom you’re not gaming nor trying to seduce.
* She’s a part of your social circle: which entails the above 2 exceptions. You’re not gaming her (for whatever reason) but she might’ve gone to the club with y’all.
Why is it OK to buy drink(s) for such girls in the above 3 exceptional cases?
You’re not expecting anything from them (sexual nor physical). So feel free to get your P. Diddy on and buy the whole damn bar out!!
Those girls won’t be psycho analyzing you and your intentions, saying to themselves, “Why is he buying me drinks? Is he tryna buy me? Does he think I’m that easy? He might have bad intentions. I gotta be cautious with this muthafucka”!
Hence, it’s ok to buy drinks for girls with whom you’re already acquainted, since you’re not trying to pick them up. Therefore, they won’t question your actions of ulterior motives.
The girls you should NOT buy drinks for
This is polar opposite to the girls you MAY buy drinks for.
Simply put…Do not buy drinks for girls you’re trying to pick up!
Unless she’s earned it!
Therefore, that fine-ass lass who’s looking all bored and lonely hovering at the bar, whom you’ve been eyeing all night – “Do not approach her with the opening line being an offer to buy her a drink!
Do not approach her trying to break the ice with, “May I get you a drink”?
One of three things will happen:
A.) She will say, “yea-sure“! Then drink you out for the whole fucking night while pretending to be into you.
Note: She isn’t to be blamed for accepting the drink(s). Your dumb ass should be blamed for buying the drink(s)!
B.) She will say, “Yea-sure”! Get the drink, come up with some clever/bullshit excuse for coming back, “I’m gonna use the restroom for a sec.”. Then she never returns: leaving you like an asshole frozen in time in the middle of the club, while she dodges you all night and tell her friends how much of an looser you are, who thought he could buy his way into her skin-tight jeans!!!
C.) She will simply say, “No thanks“.
Note: She would be wise to say no since she doesn’t know you. For all she knows, you’re some creepy fucking stalker looking to date rape her by slipping one in her Mimosa.
Hence it’s a much safer bet to NOT approach her at all with “buying her a drink line”.
Save your time, cash and esteem.
“So…, what should I do instead”?
Do what you’d normally do as an opener. But exclude the ‘drink proposition’.
If she’s earned it (down the line)-feel free to splurge a bit.
It’s that simple!!!
There’s not a worst feeling in the world to a girl, than when a guy subcommunicates his intentions through a drink.
Also let’s be real here guys! How many times had you bought a girl a drink while saying to yourself, “I hope this bitch gets hammered and pissy drunk and ends up coming home with me”!
If not that exact line, some variation of it.
To avoid the social stigmas of being a Date-Rapist, Creepy Guy, Charming Guy who makes her weirded out by doing kind acts, just don’t buy her a drink at all (or as yet)!
The insane irony is- “95% of girls WON’T even ask the guy to buy her a drink!
Therefore it kills the shit out of me that guys would even suggest buying drinks, as if it’s a prerequisite to conversation!!!
Girls with at LEAST an ounce of class or a tinge of dignity ,would feel cheap asking a random guy to buy her a drink.
Even the lowest of girls on the social totem pole, would have enough social value to refrain from begging drinks from strange guys at a bar, whom she’s only known for 5 minutes (via chat).
therefore, if the girl herself won’t ask; then guys…WTF are you doing buying!!?
What I’ve witnesses:
I’ve been clubbing hard-non stop for the past 9 years, as if I were a coked-up version of some fist-pumping Guido from the Jersey Shore!
The MOST common theme I see play out [a painful theme at that], is guys buying fucking drinks for random girls (when they haven’t earned it)!!!
Then at the end of the night, they’re going home with whom they came: their buddies or by themselves.
Ultimately, trying to get the girl drunk by feeding her drinks after drinks didn’t pay off.
There are exceptions to every rule in life and between the sexes.
Sure, it does happen where buying drinks may pay off and result in a lay. But how often?
One in 10 cases?
For reference sake, let’s say there’s a nightclub: we’ll call it Club X.
Perfect ratio of dicks to vaginas: 300 dudes, 300 chicks.
Knowing how scared and socially inept men are (compared to women), let’s assume 100 of those men have enough cravats to approach women in Club X.
It’d be rational (from trend) to surmise that 80 of those men would offer to buy drink(s) for the girls they’d approached and chat up.
Sixty of those girls are crazy, thirsty or broke enough to accept drinks from the random guys.
Now, the 60 out of 300 girls at Club X who’d accepted drinks, how many of them do you think actually go home with the guys who bought them drinks?
Don’t fucking lie guys! I know we’ve all been there so it’s painful to admit.
Any rational guy would assume that not even 5 of those 60 girls, who accepted drinks, actually got laid afterwards by the dreaded Drink-Buyers.
That’s a WHOPPING 5 out of 300 girls who may actually go home with the drink buyers!
Im no Einstein, but that’s fucking 6%!!!
Only 6% of girls at the club ‘MAY’ go home with a random guy who’d bought her drinks!
And remember, I’m not talking about girls whom you might’ve known prior, neither a girl you’re on a date with. I’m talking about RANDOM strangers whom you’d cold approach in the club.
So the lesson here is: Don’t buy her drinks unless she’s earned it.
I keep parenthesizing “unless she’s earned it”.
Click the following link to read part 2/continuation to this article, of the 1 TRUE exception to buying a random girl a drink: