Greatest Obstacle To Getting Laid Is Not Her Beliefs: It’s Bad Logistics.

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This post is specifically geared towards shedding some light on female psychology when it comes to dating.

Looking back at my past lays and almost lays, and analyzing other guys’ situations, I realize that the greatest obstacle to getting laid is logistics-not what the girl believes (her beliefs).

A lot of newbies on seduction forums get it twisted also by being swindled into ‘taking it slow’, respecting her views and values.

Cool- we should respect everyone’s views, but when it comes to dating and sex, a woman’s views and values mean Nothing…Nada!

Prime example:

Girl tells guy, “I don’t sleep with guys on the 1st. date. Not even the 3rd.date”.

An AFC or newbie would buy this shit, thus taking such declarations literal.

He being misinformed would then wait,or not go KINO out of fear of rejection, or fear of offending her values on not banging on the 1st. date.

Up and coming dating coaches like myself, we know better than to fall for this BS, so we plow anyway accordingly.

And the spin-off insight here is that chics’ frames and beliefs are friggin’ pliable and weak!

Humans in general go against what they believe. But with women, going against their values are much more common.

I don’t have figure for this so Im only basing it on personal experiences (which is the best teacher).

My point? A woman’s frame is weak!

Every woman wants to come off as assertive, strong and firm, but when faced with someone who gets it, she won’t mine betraying her previously-held beliefs just for that moment.

So when a chic tells me she doesn’t have sex out if wedlock(anymore), that shit flies out the other ear in a heart beat!

Same as when a girl tells me she has a BF and she thinks cheating is a grave sin, I game on just as if she was single.

Having the knowledge that her frame can be beaten and her beliefs and views are bullshit in the moment, I pay no mind to her views.

Logistics:

So the greatest obstacle to getting ass is logistics (bad ones).

I’ve never had a pick up fucked up because of the girl’s belief or that she’s celebate or some shit.

But I’ve had sets fuck up many times because of poor logistics.

Examples of bad logistics fucking up potential lays:

1. After the club, tried taking the girl home but wasn’t thinking and forgot to park the car nearby (to kill any backward rationalizing by her)

2. My crib was too friggin dirty

3. Living with my grandma once so couldn’t lay the chic in peace.

4. No where to lay her, took her to my uncle’s spot but he wasn’t home!

I can go on and on and on bro!

Push comes to shove, I’d lay a girl anywhere possible, so logistics have to really be flubbed up if I didn’t lay her on a street corner or behind a dumpster.

The lesson here is guys, don’t let her views, religion, beliefs deter you from seducing her.

Girls are willing to put their beliefs aside for a good time or for one night.

Why being in a relationship kills your pick-up skills, and how to avoid it

Photo provided by www.mebeats.com

Photo provided by http://www.mebeats.com

Why Being in a relationship kills your pick-up skills: and how to avoid it.

Let me say this from the get-go:

A relationship is NOT game!

Relationships are totally different ball game to seduction and picking up girls.

What applies in picking up chics will not apply in managing an LTR.

Relationship management is a totally different sphere than managing getting laid.

I had to learn that the hard way. And I sucked at managing my relationship since I was trying to apply the same concepts as if I was trying to seduce a stranger.

Ok, most of the insights I’ll share in this article is from my personal experiences in my LTR: so this ain’t no second-hand bullshit info’ from someone else’s LTR.

So,why does being in a relationship kills a guy’s pick-up skills?

Quite simple:

*We men tend to settle into a pattern as the LTR progresses. That pattern consists of being lazy and passive.

“What the hell! I got the girl already so I can relax”.

We subconsciously fall into that mindset. Which is ok if you intend to be with that one girl your entire life. Or if you intend in not being a social creature again.

But if you’re as normal as any other guy: you’d want to be social and have a social life.

My Story:

Before entering my LTR (2 and a half years ago), I was a rockstar at picking up women. I was a fucking savage!

Met my current GF, go through the usual ups & downs, work on shit…

Typical relationship.

Like many guys, I got into the flow of things; playing the boyfriend role as much as possible.

But I was simultaneously killing my social skills in general since I didn’t need those pick-up skills set anymore [I already succeeded in getting a girlfriend].

Huge mistake!

About a year down the line, we had a brief split-up and I wanted to re-enter the field of “game”.

I did-but to no avail.

I was like a fish out of water.

Not particularly ’cause I was so used to my relationship and my girlfriend.

But because I hadn’t gamed anyone in almost a year, my skills were fucking rusty!

Put a naked girl infront of me and I wouldn’t know what to do with her (smfh).

Most of my prior-pick up skills had vanished so whenever I tried approaching a new girl at a bar or street pick up, I totally C&B (crash and burn) in set.

This would repeat itself weeks after weeks, leaving me jaded and confused as to why the hell I wasn’t able to pull anything!

Got back with my LTR, shit went sour, split up for few weeks, and still wasn’t able to pull any new girls just to have a decent chat.

So I analyzed the situation,did some research about this, and found some interesting tips and insights as to my sticking point.

I surmised that my skills had depleted because of being in a standard relationship, subjected to social norms.

The social norms of a relationship are:

*Fidelity
*limit on socializing (particularly with the opposite sex)
*Compromising

Those 3 tenents compose a standard relationship in the western world.

Fidelity and compromising are ok.

But to limit yourself on how much you socialize and with whom: that shit ultimately kills one’s social skills or pick-up skills.

Therefore, over the past 6 months, I decided to get my mojo back [at least when it comes to socializing].

I wasn’t all contrite and secretive about it neither. I did tell my LTR that I’ll be communicating more in general. And That I’ll be socializing more.

I manned the fuck up and laid some ground rules down for my relationship!

And that’s what a lot of us men need to start doing-defining what we want and what we will and will not accept in a relationship.

A lot of us get into relationships then stop doing stuff we were accostumed to- like going out: no more clubs, bars, games, hang-outs, etc.

Limits are definitely crucial, but a guy who was used to going to the bar bi-weekly shouldn’t have to give that up if he intends to have or maintain a relationship.

And it’s not the woman’s fault!

It’s not like she held a gun to your head and threatened to shoot you if you go out alone this weekend.

We men just tend to follow societal norms as we get into the swing of an LTR, so we abandon everything we knew about being social and getting girls.

If you never had any game nor social skills prior to getting a girlfriend- then this article doesn’t apply.

On the contrary, if you were like me: decent game and loved to be social, then it’s beneficial to define your relationship early and that you intend to remain social.

If she cannot accept that, then there’s no reason to continue in such a relationship which robs you of a basic freedom to be social.

So after making it clear to my LTR that I intend to be my social-self again, we agreed that that was doable.

But that only left me in a friggin’ quagmire. I had to re learn shit like how to be comfortable in social settings, and how to engage people in decent chats without stalling and seeming awkward.

So I had to re- teach myself all the shit I ever learned about being social. All the basics.

That could’ve been avoided if I’d never fell into the proverbial monotony of my relationship.

Learn from my mistakes guys.

Be wary of falling into a routine of a relationship.

Dick sizes and guys’ insecurities

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Hey what’s up guys?

I got the concept for this post after reading an article on TSBmag by Natasha Abrams: What she thinks of your penis size.

However, my article delves a bit deeper into the male psyche when it comes to size.

Now, Im not gonna get into the whole argument of ‘what women prefer’.

Frankly, I believe it varies.

Some chics may prefer Mandingo: while others are content with a weiner.

Im looking at it from the guy’s viewpoint. Im a guy, so I know better when it comes to how we feel on a personal level.

Irony is, most guys probably never even pondered this concept as I have [I’m such an analytical bastard].

Ok, what am I getting at?

*Every guy is insecure of his dick size!!!

Im gonna explain in a second, but let me give y’all a little back-story supporting my theory.

Ok, it’s no secret that guys can be real juvenile whenever we congregate to talk shit.

Few years ago, I was working at an all-male company (talk about a sausage-fest environment). On our lunch break, we gathered to chit chat about girls, getting laid…so the subject of DICKS would naturally popped up occasionally.

At that time, I was a first-class homophobe, so guys talking about dicks was not a topic I wanted to entertain.

Anywho, I played moderator from the sidelines while listening to my co-workers trash it out about who has the bigger phallus and shit.

The argument led nowhere. None of us knew which one had the bigger dick.

The only way for us, or any guy for that matter, to know who’s bigger, is to have a dick-off; literally show each dick!

That wasn’t gonna go down among 6 heterosexual guys. Plus, that’d be fucking gay!

So the only means to determine who’s bigger (a dick-showing contest)-none of the guys would be willing to go that route (they never even proposed it).

So the argument went nowhere. Nothing resolved.

Fast forward to this moment as Im blogging this, I realized something about men: a deep deep insecurity about our members.

What makes us insecure is this:

*We do NOT know what the other guy’s packing.

If that phrase seemed like a paradox, let me break it down some more.

I don’t know what Jim’s packing, and I frankly wouldn’t care!

Jim doesn’t know what Im packing neither, so it’s a futile argument to argue who’s bigger.

We just won’t know.

Since both of us don’t know.Nor do any other guy knows, you would think as braggadocious men we are, we would instinctively assume that the other guy is smaller.

Wrong!!

Men are so insecure about their sizes, we would assume the other guy is bigger.

I don’t give a shit if you have a King Kong dick. Since you don’t know what the guy next to you has, out of insecurity, You’d assume he has a bigger King Kong dick than yours.

Case in point, 1 of the same former co-worker of mines was known for having a Mandingo[among our social circle, we happened to lay the same girls, and most of them concluded that M***a had a baseball bat lol].

And he knew this because we were all part of the same social circle!

But even the fact that chics in our social circle told us he was much bigger, the fact that he didn’t know what every guy had, made him feel inadequate still.

But I can see why.

If Im standing in a room with 20 guys and I happened to have a 15 incher (which would be huge). For all I know,those other 20 guys have 20 inchers!

The reality of not being in “the know”, would make any guy humble himself.

Just like a pro-boxer:

No matter how confident he is, if he’s presented with an un-known challenger, who he’s never seen(nor had any tapes to study of him), doubt, fear and questions will arise. Simply because he doesn’t know what the other guy has.

So the question of, “Does dick size matter”, is irrelevant to this post.

I just wanted to point out “dick size” from a guy’s point of view. And how insecurity plays a dominant role when you think about it.

Random Escapade Field Report With A Stalker-Chick

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Interesting story guys:

Past Sunday night on my way to the club, I spotted a girl standing alone outside.

Well, nothing strange in that.

However, something was odd about this picture:

1. She wasn’t dressed as if she was going clubbing.

2. Hair disheveled.

3. She stood afar as if to not be seen.

Anywho, being the king of social game, I approached her [without any pick-up routines; just banter]:

Me: “Hey, if that’s how you going in the club tonight…much props to you girl [smiley face]”.

Lone Wolf: “Lol what’s that supposed to mean”.

Me: “I’m just saying. Seems like your girl crew abandoned you. That’s messed up”.

Lone Wolf: “Lol nah, I’m actually not going in. Im tryna find someone”.

Me: “Its’ 1 am, I doubt this the best time to be out looking for someone”.

Lone Wolf: “Its’ my boyfriend. If he thinks I’m gonna be watching kids all night while he’s out clubbing-fuck that!!

Alarm bells rang off!

Baby-mama drama. This is not the type of shit for me!

So now I’m looking for a quick exit out of this chat so as to not get caught up in any drama before the night even kicked off. But then again, my drama-loving intuition kicked in. Plus she wasn’t the ugliest girl I seen for the day. She was probably an HB7 with melon-sized tits: so WTH!

Me: “Well….I doubt you want him to spot you…so let’s go somewhere nearby to sit and chat”.

As any Alpha should, I took her hand and started walking the opposite direction from the club.

Some token resistance as expected:

Lone Wolf: “Where are we going? There’s nowhere to sit around here”.

Playfully kept leading her to the nearest secluded spot, by the way, which happens to be adjacent to some huge-ass dumpsters [talk about shitty logistics].

I rapidly KINO escalated like a fucking machine on auto!

Some more token resistance reared it’s ugly head, so she said, “I think people can see us from here”.

Bull-fuckin’ shit!!!

So I eased off the heavy KINO to start dancing with her to some music which was coming from the opened-air club.

Lone Wolf: “Oh shit, is that him”!!?

Me: “Him who”?

Lone Wolf: “That fucking bastard boyfriend of mines. He’s the one in front”!

A drunken crew of guys was strolling our way, making more noise than a lynch mob ready to hang someone.

So now I’m like, “WTF are you doing, spying on him”?

Lone Wolf: “I wouldn’t say spying. His ass just shouldn’t expect me to baby sit all day while he gets drunk and flirt with bitches”!

Wow! An actual female-staked in the flesh!

Now I’m just praying that her drunk BF and his mob don’t spot us beside this dumpster and fuck my ass up!

But this lunatic chick wanted to confront him so I had to try my best to talk her ass out of doing it right then and there…while I’m there :).

Potential bomb defused (yes!), so as the mob passed, I felt relieved.

She wanted to follow them. I wanted to bang her outdoors.

My frame was stronger (or her hormones were raging), so the KINO re-commenced.

It went as far as tit-play ’cause she kept saying she had to go now, she left her kids home alone…bla, bla, bla.

Psycho alarms went off. But I knew better, that this was just standard-token resistance.

We fooled around some more. But her impulse to run off to stalk her boyfriend/baby daddy was stronger than my frame. So I called it a night and headed to the club.

Lessons to take away:

* Frame control is key. Have a stronger frame than hers will get you far.

* Its’ better to escalate fast until she stops you, than to not escalate at all.

* Fuck the perfect logistics! If you can lay her in the middle of heavy traffic- do it! The logistics will never be 100% in your favor.

The key insight I learned from this field-report escapade was that women can be just as needy as men.

I never thought in a million years that a chick would virtually stalk her boyfriend when she can just easily phone 1 of her options as most women have on the back-burner.

Ciao!!!

My favorite rum ever

20111014-043837.jpgLet me say this from the get-go: if Malibu doesn’t give me a year’s worth supply of free bottles for endorsing their rum, I may have to make a switch to Coco Caribe [no hard feelings Mali’]!

Typically, everyone I know mixes it with OJ but I prefer pineapple juice instead.

How many of y’all actually drink Malibu or any other coconut rum?

Feedback appreciated.

Showing some blog love to my readers

Hey ladies & broskies, Im just sending some love to y’all for checking out my blog.

I find it pretty hard to stay relevant and keep up with content at times.

I guess it’s customary to fall into drought where you may go months without posting anything.

However, my readers keep me blogging.

Peace out, and stay alpha guys!

Thanks for checking out my blog fellaz.

Suggestion on staying motivated to write would be appreciated.

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Getting my Paul Janka on; scruffy-facial hair is attractive

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Contrary to popular belief: having some facial hair ‘is’ attractive to women.

I didn’t need a PHD in grooming to reach this conclusion; just friggin’ ask women, it is that simple!

I personally took a survey among my female-Facebook friends, where I’d asked each one of them, “Is facial hair a turn off”?

The answers surprised the shit out of me!

A whopping 80% of the females said NO! Having some scruffs and stubbles are NOT turn offs.

The remanding 20% were pretty much neutral or undecided.

Prior to my survey, I was totally against the scruffy-look while trying to attract women and get my game on.

But I have to give props to the NYC-dating coach Paul Janka, who was the first pick-up artist to advocate this look.

Prior to Paul’s emergence on the scene as a friggin’ rockstar, most dating coaches and gurus were rocking the traditional goatee or clean-shaven look.

While every pick-up artist was pushing the “must be well-groomed” slogan, Paul Janka was still getting laid in NYC [his mantra] like a wild rabbit with 10 dicks.

If I’m correct, I think RooshV (Rooshv’s Blog), the pick-up artist rocks the scruffy look also.

The human psychology behind this is pretty interesting and quite elementary:

*The rough-facial hair look appeals to womens’ sense of SEX.
Good-dominant sex is akin to rough sex oppose to love making.

When a girl spots a guy she’s sexually attracted to, she isn’t saying to herself, “I wonder what it would be like making love with this guy: preferably in a Pasteur of pink roses well perfumed”.

Lol hell no!!!

She’s saying to herself, “I wonder what it’d be like being banged hard by that fucking stud: preferably untop of the kitchen table. Or somewhere adventurous and steamy where I can smell the pheromones oozing from his sweaty body”!

Ok I exaggerated the hell out of that one. But y’all get the point.

So,what is the correlation between rough sex and a guy having rough/scruffy facial hair?

As I explained above, “the rough look appeals to a woman’s sense of sex, probably more so than a well-groomed look.

This all ties into the “Badboy” persona, which chiccs just go awol over. Think of the Fonz if he had the scruffy-facial hair look to his character. Women would absolutely go nuts over him,eventhough he was already a chick-magnet.

Now I’m not saying that every guy should kick his barber to the curb, or toss his manual razors in the dumpster and start growing some facial hair.

But a key insight for me here is, I don’t have to proverbially kill myself if I happen to miss an appointment with the local barber.

Or if my clippers go missing or some shit, I won’t have to panic as if the world’s about to end.

Nah!

I can still confidently head out to the bar to get my social on, despite looking a bit rough in the face.

Having too much (social) value can mess up your game

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This post was inspired by CodeVeroby, who made an interetesting comment on one of my last posts.

I’m not quite sure if he advocated this insight or he was just quoting Brad. Nevertheless, I personally feel that being too-high valued actually kills your chances.

I first came across this insight years ago but I can’t remember which dating guru wrote the article on it.

The guru was basically saying that, “when trying to game certain girls (shy types specifically), it’s best to dial down the value”.

What give girls the impression that a guy has too much social value (according to me)?

*Peacocking too much (being dresses too flashy).

*Seeming like a celeb or rockstar.

*Being overly social and too high energies.

Having too much of the above 3 qualities to your style can actually ruin your chances.

With girls of equally-high value and social status-cool, feel free to pretend to be Brad Pitt’s sidekick in his next action flick!

Girls of high value only deal with guys of equal or higher value than themselves anyway.

But with your average Jane, who’s not a rockstarette, who’s your average everyday reserved girl, the guy trying to game her should in effect lower his perceived value.

It kills me when top-dating coaches say shit like social value is a myth or it doesn’t exist.

Bullshit!!

A while back, I listened a podcast by the dating coach Speer of Speer Method, who claimed that value in pick up is Bullshit and it doesn’t exist.

That’s BULLSHIT!

If social value wasn’t real, then why aren’t HB 10’s strolling down the bloc, arm in arm with vagrants and bums?

Why do hot girls reject guys who have poor body language if value wasn’t real?

So social value is real!

Contrary to popular belief, if Brad Pitt were to approach an average shy girl, everyday girl, she will NOT automatically rip her panties off for Brad to screw the shit out of her.

An A-list celeb would actually have a hard time laying chics!

Believe it brodie!!!

The NY dating coach Paul Janka, appeared on a pick-up artist podcast years ago where he said this (quoting Bruce Willis): “Bruce Willis said that he actually got more ass from being an average bartender in NYC than he got as a celebrity”.

So being a celebrity i.e. having high-social value, does NOT mean you’re gonna be getting laid like a Rockstar!

The elusive WHY?

When the average girl is being seduced or games by a guy of much- higher value or a celeb’, these are the things that play out in here mind:

* “Why would he be attracted to me”?

* “I’m so out of his league”.

* “We couldn’t possibly have anything in common”.

Typical shit women say to themselves when presented with a guy of much higher status.

Self doubt comes flying in: which would lead to her flaking later on.

So the guy (or celeb) must in effect lower his value to be on equal plane with the target, which lets her see that there ‘is’ a genuine reason why a guy like you would want to get with a girl like her.

So it takes calibration to make this happen.

Look at my sticking point for example:

I love to peacocking out my ass!

Whenever I go out to any venue,I roll like a Rockstar via wardrobe and accessories.

That’s cool! No harm in that.

But whenever I approach girls of lesser perceived value (shy/reserved type), sets don’t fucking hook!

They give the obligatory “hi” and all that, but it never goes anywhere most times.

If I do manage to # close, she ends up flaking.

This sticking point of mines really bothered me and fucked up my game for almost the past 3 years!

I had to dig into my proverbial vault of pick-up notes to actually figure out this flaw in my game.

The paradox is, I would have decent success with girls of same or high value: girls who were “somebody”, the bitch types, the Alpha females, the ones whose ass were kissed.

But I couldn’t fucking pull a shy girl to save my life!

She didn’t have to be shy, but just the average-laid back girl I couldn’t pull!

WTF!!

In retrospect, after reviewing my seduction notes the other day, I realize the problem was that I presented too much value to the average girl.

I gave off a Rockstar vibe, which is cool for seducing Rockstarettes/Alpha females.

But it’s bad for trying to seduce the girlfriend of the alpha female.

The solution for me or for the guy who’s facing this dilemna:

When trying to seduce a girl who isn’t a social-butterfly: don’t come into the set too high energied.

This should be common knowledge by now.

You should always calibrate your tone and vibe to match that of the girl whom you’re gaming.

If she’s high energied, which implies high status among her peer group, you the guy must come in high energied also to match her.

Likewise, if she’s shy, reserved, laid-back, etc., tone down your energy.

This shit is key bro’!!

Simple mistakes and miscalibrations like I mentioned can mean the difference between getting laid and jerking off for the next year.

I’ve been there over the past 2 years and a half.

Once again, thanks to CodeVeroby for mentioning this in the commentary on my last post.

My reality check about Same-Night Club Lays: Girls just wanna have fun

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Whoever wrote a book about how women are such emotionally attached creatures when it comes to post-sex…Kill yourself!!!

This article isn’t addressing all chicas [I love Spanish]. I’m specifically talking about the club/bar girls.

Now, I’ve learnt a lot about women, being immersed in the seduction community.

But one piece of advise which really pays dividends is this:

“Always assume that a girl is a one-nighter or same-night lay”.

And that quote is specifically addressing club/bar chicas.

We guys tend to always prejudge women as being angels, re-incarnations of Mother Teresa, prudish, monogamous…when we should enter the interaction with the mindset, “she’s down for whateva”.

Ok, let me fast forward to the relevancy of my situation.

Few years ago, I’d picked up the hottest girl in the club [ read here ].

We made out, with some PU tactics, I managed to get her back to my guest house.

Not having a fucking condom, I wasn’t able to bang her.

Side note: it seems like whenever I forget to buy rubbers, those are the times I’m presented with most lay opportunities!

When I do have a stack of condoms on me: I’m never getting lays [talk about a paradox].

Anyway, so we settled for some mutual- oral play since I wasn’t able to bang her raw dog.

Holy shit: this girl literally squirts!!!

She’s the first and only squirter I ever met! This chic fucking squirts like 10 yards: no fucking kidding!!

I gave her like 5 squirting orgasms within 15 minutes via finger fucking her.

I felt like a kid in a candy store or a guy who just discovered some crazy shit!

Anyway, we had fun! It’s in essence an SNL eventhough we never had intercourse.

Even the occasions I did bang girls the same night after the club-the same theme almost always plays out, which is:

‘The girl moves on’.

I was leaving that morning to go back to the neighboring island(Barbuda), so she walked me to the ferry just around the corner.

A day passed- she never called me.

I phoned her later, we chatted few minutes but I felt a coldness about the vibes, as if she didn’t wanna talk.

Not as if she felt hurt or dissed, but her vibe was as if she’s not fucking into me. Like “why is he calling”?

Not getting the hint that “girls just wanna have fun”, I phoned her the next day but no answer.

Phoned her few days later, no answer!

Phoned her from someone else’s mobile about a week later, she answers, then her tone sunk as she realized it was Me.

Believe me guys: I wasn’t being needy here like some AFC pussy.

I was merely following post-sex protocol: which is to not totally cut her off if I’d liked to see her again.

But I never got the memo nor the hint that this chic was merely looking to get laid that night!

So wasn’t looking for strings attached nor the possibility of an LTR (relationship). She wanted to fuck!

But we men find it hard to believe that women can be so “like us”, or promiscuous.

So I treated this case and girl as status quo and end up looking like a needy dick in the end.

Moral of the story?

Never assume that the girl at the club/bar whom you’re gaming is looking for something long term.

Assume she’s a Same Night Lay, and treat it as such by pressing the issue to bang her that night.

If you do manage to pull it off: don’t get excited like I did!

Be nonchalant and let the vibe flow.

Don’t call her after sex.

If she’s interested in seeing you again: she will call!

If she’s really just a one-nighter, then she won’t call. Or she would call just to allay the perception that you’d see her as a slut [woman’s #1 fear].

But I’d totally played that the wrong way.

Peace out fellas!

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